In the newspaper: BevoXIII died recently. He is most known for crapping on the Cornhuskers' field in Nebraska.
On MSNBC.com: Sports nuts men will wait until AFTER the game is finished on TV to go to the Emergency room (because yes, the team is only going to win if you are at home yelling like an idiot at the TV) (OK, OK, so I have been known to yell at various people on my TV as well).
Bone density for women decreases by drinking Colas. Damn.
The FBI and CIA apparently don't want to know what the terrorists are thinking because they aren't pushing for their agents to learn foreign languages. Only 1% (33 persons) speak Arabic at all, and of those, only 1 speaks it fluently. The FBI won't let him work in Arabic countries though because he was born in Egypt...he may be a terrorist you know.
The Yankees' pitcher died in a plane crash. It was remnisent of 9-11...only without at much death and destruction.
and the biggest story of the night: Decaf Coffee contains Caffeine...didn't they discover this like 5 years ago? because I could have sworn...