1:00 am: Wake up because my stupid watch somehow had the alarm set. Take 3 minutes to figure out what that beeping is. Insist on thinking, for at least 2 of those minutes, that my alarm clock is crazy and is making this weird beeping noise. Eventually realize that when I lean toward the alarm clock, the beeping gets quieter, not louder. Figure out it's the watch. Easily get it turned off. Become obsessed with making sure this never happens again and get up at 1:05 to find the instructions for the watch and un-set the damn alarm.
1:15 am: Go back to bed
7:30 am: Wake up because Shawn has to get up for work. Have a glass of juice and convince self that going for a jog is a good idea. Get dressed in jogging clothes.
7:45am: Decide to start live blogging. Spend the next 10 minutes doing this instead of jogging. Must go jog so I can come back and take a shower.
7:55am: let Quazi outside.
8:00am: realize it's raining out. leave to go jog anyhow. Because I am nothing if not stupid. Besides, now I truly know what it means for it to be suffocatingly muggy. It is because you can't breathe. It's like you're actually suffocating. Or, that could just be the jogging. I'm not sure. to be on the safe side, I should probably refrain from jogging ever again.
8:45am: get back home. Surf the internet for 30 minutes. Learn important things about why the housing market still hasn't hit bottom, why you shouldn't always trust "best of" lists, register Shawn for the No-Call list (he's been getting phone calls letting him know that the warranty on his 1982 Volkswagon is about to expire), and finally, check email.
9:15am: clean bathrooms and kitchen. Tidy up the rest of the house.
9:20am: Let IV outside
9:21am: Huge clap of thunder
9:22am: Let IV inside
9:23am: Starts pouring rain
9:30am: The Prodigal Quazums returneth and subsequently leaveth butt-print and footprint all overeth the place where food cooking commences:
9:50am: Return to cleaning the house.
10:02am: Let IV back outside
10:03am: Let Quazi back outside
10:39am: House if finished being tidied up. Now I need to get to the actual cleaning. boo.
11:36am: Cleaning the bathrooms. yippee
12:05pm: Finally finished cleaning. Now to clean myself. Yes, the life of a housewife--maybe taking a shower in the afternoon.
12:54pm: Go shoe shopping. No, really I did this.
1:30pm: Leave store sans shoes because they don't have the size I need. Must order shoes online.
1:35pm: walk into tea shop to get a drink. OOO Ginger brew! that sounds good. it must be like ginger ale!
1:37pm: OH GOOD GOD! this stuff is HORRID! It's like my mouth is on fire, but not! egads, who would even like this stuff?!
1:46pm: Throw away rest of ginger brew and leave The Domain. Drive to Whole Foods.
1:54pm: What the hell do you mean they don't have peaches? Yes I realize that it's not peach season any more, it's also not blackberry season, but you're still selling those! But the HEB is still selling peaches, so I guess that means I have to go to 2 grocery stores. DAMN! But, to be fair, the Whole Foods had their pineapples for $2.50--the HEB is still selling them for $3.99.
2:27pm: leave Whole Foods ($30 worth of food), and head off to the HEB to get the remainder of my ingredients for dinner tonight. spend another $50 on food and wine.
3:03pm: g0 home, unpack groceries.
3:04pm: NO! I forgot to buy the pasta?!?! CRAP! Well, let's see...I've got some penne in the cupboard, and pasta wheels, and elbow mac...surely one of those will work. But the little corkscrews would have been so nice...
3:07pm: mix ingredients for cake. Decide it's not worth it to get out a mixer, and decide to mix everything by hand.
3:10pm: Well...now I know why all those little old ladies have arthritis in their hands. Also, I realized I do not have 8 or 9" rounds. Well, I do have them, but they are old and rusty and disgusting looking. So I threw them away (I don't feel bad about this either since I bought them for $0.25 at the ARC when I was a sophomore in college...that was like 5 years ago. Besides, as I said disgusting). I must remember to add these to my Christmas wish list.
3:12pm: put cakes in oven to bake. Now I ought to work on the insides of the cake (roasted blueberries and peaches).
5:24pm: Finished making the insides of the cake, and immediately moved onto making the lamb ragu, which is now simmering away on the stove. I managed to only cut myself 2 times (one didn't bleed at all...I should probably have that checked out). this is the first time I've ever made the carrot/celery/onion tiny pieces mixture. so, we'll see how that turns out. I also decided to take the liberty of altering the cake recipe: 1) it told me to make a vanilla cake. So I bought a boxed version. 2) it told me to cut the cooked cake in half, fill in the innards, put the top half on and refrigerate. But lo, I don't feel like doing that so I just spread the innards on the top of the cake. I shall call it roasted peach and blueberry upside down cake. And it shall be delicious. Actually I don't know if it will be delicious. Mostly because it says I need to refrigerate the cake for a minimum of 8 hours. And it will only be refrigerated for a total of 2.
5:29pm: must find how to roast garlic for garlic bread.
5:33pm: Well, that was easy...and I can't start that until about 6:30...I guess this means I need to go clean up the federally declared disaster zone that has become my kitchen.
6:15pm: attempt to buy shoes online. Notice I said Attempt.
7:39pm: Dinner is served.
9:41pm: Cleanup commences (I transfer dirty dishes from the table to the sink, then wipe down the countertop and rangetop).
9:44pm: Watch Two and a Half Men
10:26pm: Get ready for, and go to, bed.